Conversation Between Me and My Body...
My body: Hey, got a sec?
Me: Yeah, what's up?
My body: You know how lately you've gained some weight and your sleeping schedule is bad and you don't have a lot of energy?
Me: Yeah. It's annoying.
My body: Well, we've been talking and... We think you should stop eating pizza every other day.
Me: What?
My body: Yeah.
Me: How about instead of that you just do a better job at metabolizing it? And give me more energy?
My body: It doesn't work that way.
Me: Well, it should.
My body: That's a stupid thing to say. Also: Perhaps we could start running again? Remember how good we felt when we used to run regularly?
Me: If I start running again can we eat pizza?
My body: No. The pizza thing has to stop. Oh, and don't get us started on cereal at 4AM. Do you know what happens when you eat carbs every night at 4AM?
Me: No. I shouldn't have to know. You should just take care of it.
My body: It's becoming clear you don't know much about us.
Me: Fine. I'll cut down on pizza and late-night cereal. And I'll start running.
My body: Thanks. Trust us, you'll be happier. Oh, and one more thing.
Me: Yeah?
My body: About all that whiskey you drank at SXSW...
Me: F*ck off.
<I think my body has been trying to have this same talk with me, but I keep pushing the meeting back.>
Mar 25th